My first born son.

Thirty-five years ago today I became a mommy for the first time. My heart began to know love in a way I had never known it. I was enamored with the fact that God blessed Kyle's and my love with this creation that was our son. Any mother will agree with the indescribable love she feels when her child is put in her arms after birth.

Born on May 2, our little Benjamin Kyle Bergen, nicknamed Benji.

Our new little family getting acquainted in the hospital after Benji's birth.

Benji has always been full of adventure. From the moment he could walk, he was crawling out his bedroom window, getting lost in the woods and hiding in secret places.

He loved the outdoors.

Ben at Ella's age of about 15 months.

 As he grew and we moved from Waterloo to woodland Georgia mountains, adventures unfolded even more. Stories are endless. And the name changed to Ben.

Ben moved to North Carolina a couple years after high school

and has lived there ever sense.

Today, Ben's family includes Anna, and their daughter, Ella. Ben adores and pours his life into his family every day. It is no surprise that the home he has built for his family is a-top a mountain where he has developed the very highest five acres of the mountain to be his family's home. He enjoys the outdoors that surrounds him and his family. Ben loves fly fishing, both alone and in guided trips he provides for other fishermen.

Ben and Ella today at the Creek celebrating Daddy's birthday.

Ben loves the Lord and leads his family to grow in relationship with Jesus too.
I so wish the 3 1/2 hours between us melted away more often,
as we love our time with Ben and his family

Ben, Anna and Ella Faye

Happy Birthday Benji, I love you so much!

Sister time.

I have always loved having a 'big sister' even though there were 12 years between us. Everyone else calls her Donna, but to our family, she is Donnie. She has been an amazing example to me over the years as I have grown up. I remember staying in her dorm at college when I was a little girl, and in her first apartment in Chicago when she had her first teaching job and countless times we took our young family to join with their young family in Indiana, making memories of cousins playing together. Donnie loves the Lord, lives out her amazing gift of hospitality and is a tireless encourager.

This photograph was taken when Donnie was about 17 and was about 5 years old.

A little side note is that Donnie is standing in front of Mother's first dishwasher!

Mother had just remodeled her kitchen in the early 1960's complete with lots of chrome, pink counter tops and a chrome front-dishwasher. I remember the a dishwasher being so exciting for us!

Fast forward to this winter.



When I knew I was going to have my knee replaced, I immediately said I wanted Donnie to come and help me. She has had both knees replaced and is recently retired, so it seemed like the perfect recipe for my recovery. Not so much because I wanted her help but an opportunity to spend time together.

She and Tom got married when I was in fifth grade and began their family when I was in seventh grade. I lived with them in Indiana the summer after seventh grade so Donnie could get her master's degree in teaching and I could keep baby Annette. When I went to Indiana to college, I loved having Tom and Donnie living right down the road from my dorm. Kyle and I dated there. 

As life became busier, we have never been able to just spend a week together with no children, no agendas, no weddings, no funerals, etc. It has just never happened. Until this week. I knew this surgery time would be the time together we need and have never gotten. She was here for six days. Wonderful. We did all the things I envisioned. We ate, laughed, watched movies, looked through old photographs, talked through memories and our  families, and played on our laptops. We spent time with our Georgia children and grandchildren. She was a great encouragement to me through the pain of therapy and what I should expect as the weeks move forward.



About 50 years later than the kitchen photo above. Still about 12 years between us.
How does that happen?

The last night here, we wanted to take Donnie to a local restaurant. We chose The Pizza Farm which began in a little farmhouse in 1972. It has been through many remodeling and addition projects, but is the same ol' place as when we found it after living here just one month in 1985. It is in the middle of beautiful rolling countryside and cattle farms. There are no other places of business anywhere near it. That's part of what makes it so fun. It is unique in style and setting. Plus, we usually see neighbors there. Last night we ordered steaks (they serve lots more than pizza) and had such a nice evening as the three of us together. We completed the evening with a drive-through-treat at Dairy Queen.

One evening while Donnie was here, brother Tom and Jane made a wonderful dinner and brought it over and ate with us. It was a good reunion of Donnie, Tom and me. We just missed our other brother, Jim.  But it was still a rare opportunity for us to be together. Jane's meal was absolutely delicious, complete with tapioca pudding, home made applesauce, and all the fixin's of pot roast.

I loved how our grandchildren never missed a beat with loving Aunt Donna. You would have thought they saw her every week. Here is a picture with Caroline, Mary Anna and Doster. We did not get a picture with Rosemary when Donnie spent the night at their house. It blessed me and of course it blessed Donnie, to have these precious kids beg to see her over and over while she was here. And, I ask, why not? They know she loves them and are naturally drawn to her.

I just have to say, this was the best week for my sis and me. We grew closer and made up for some time we have missed over the years. I pray times like this will continue, and surgery won't have to be the prerequisite.

Love you, Sis!
 Betty Anne



My new BFF is titanium!

My surgery is over and I have a new titanium knee! The prayer and support from family and friends, along with God's healing hand have made it a great experience. I will go home from the hospital this evening to my temporary new furniture. A walker, commode seat with arms and a shower seat. My very own set of geriatric equipment. This is going to be fun!

I have had bad knees for more years than I can remember. I have not let painful knees hold me back, in fact I ran and walked for exercise for years. But the past six months became unbearable. Having knees replaced is a result of arthritis which is very hereditary. My mother and daddy each had both knees replaced and one of my brothers and my sister have both had both knees replaced. 

During surgery on Monday, Dr.Atwell found and removed many bone spurs (some the size of popped kernels of corn) on my knee. These obviously added to the pain I had been having. What I think is so funny......the circular saw they use to cut the bone broke during surgery and they had to locate another saw, sterilize it and re-saw! I guess our Grady joints are the pits, but at least the bones themselves are good. When we were kids and when our kids were growing up no one ever had a broken bone.

Kyle spent the first two days with me along with Katie and Elizabeth. The girls have taken good care of me and my out-of town kids have been checking on me too. My sister-in-law, Jane spent time with me yesterday. She brought me a loaf of whole wheat homemade bread. By the way, what a great get well-gift. I didn't feel like eating the hospital food and a nice slice of that soft bread with butter was a wonderful addition to each meal. Note that idea if you are a good bread baker. Jane certainly is! Next week my sister is coming to spend a week with me. Okay, so she's coming for my recuperation, but honestly, she's coming because she can! Donnie retired this year from teaching, and we are so excited that now we can spend this time together. I have a feeling the best medicine when she comes will be laughter!


Now that the surgery is over, I have enjoyed getting up, walking and stretching as my physical therapist has coached. I begin five days of home therapy Friday - Tuesday, then go to PT at a clinic three days a week for six weeks. They will work me hard, I'm sure.

It really has been a good week. I look forward to healing and walking tall without what my sweet little Doster describes as "Grandma's waddle'!

April Showers.....bring precious little legs.

A fun little shopping spree found Grandma buying rain boots for the three little girls.

The be-ribboned little boots were presented to Rosemary and Mary Anna, and mailed to Ella.

I love their precious little leggs and knees complete with boo-boos.

P.r.e.s.e.n.t.i.n.g.............Ella, Mary Anna and Rosmary in their horsey rain boots!

Mary Anna and Grandma play together.

Since I was not going to work today, I called Elizabeth and asked her to bring Mary Anna to my house to spend the morning with me. We had a sweet morning. Mary Anna is 25 months old and just as precious as they come!

We ate outside and wrote on the old chalk board that our kids played school on. This chalk board used to be in Great Grandma Anna Mae's classroom when she was a school girl.

We watched the cows through the fence, picked up rocks and when Doster came, they picked flowers (weeds) together.

I don't get Mary Anna alone very often, if ever. I use to enjoy Caroline alone at this age, but when the family grows, it's not too often we get to be alone with the littlest one.

I had such a fun time with my little buddy this morning.

More.

I want More. Better. Different. Larger. Prettier. Newer. Fresher. Shinier. Easier. Sweeter.

Where there are people there is a m.o.r.e. mindset in our society. And I don't think it is anything new. People have always wanted more. Sometimes I am one of those people. I have been less than satisfied. I have thought it would be nice to have it different.

Recently, two Holsteins came to live on our back acre. We have been removing trees, planting grass, liming and re-liming, fertilizing and re-fertilizing for a year. Kyle spent a few months putting up fence, one or two sections at a time until the job was done. (good topic for another post.)

Finally the cows joined us last month. A brown Holstein and a black Holstein. Stew and Chuck, respectively. Not named for where they have been, but for where......well you get it.

Stew and Chuck came from a dirt patch where all their food came from a trough or a bale. Now they are in the most glorious place. Perfect lush moist grass that reaches past their bellies. Each day they also get grain and have access to abundant water.

But when feeding time comes, Stew is never content with his own bucket. He starts his, then gradually pushes Chuck out of the way and is eating Chuck's food. Chuck then walks around the back of Stew, resigned to eat Stew's food. Until Stew realizes it. Of course Stew pushes Chuck away again. And on they cycle goes.

Seriously? Stew, come on, you have lush grass and water, you have abundant space, you are surrounded by new fences and you live on a mountain with a glorious view.

Step back. Take it all in. You have all you need. And more.

As Stew continues to have issues with not being satisfied, I hope I can see some of my 'wants' as unnecessary when compared with all that God has planned for and has consistently provided for me. Oh my, He gives me such lush grass and in abundance. I want to be content in what He gives me. In Him.

"Contentment is possible only as we cultivate and maintain that attitude of accepting everything that enters our lives as coming from the Hand of Him that is too wise to err and too loving to cause one of his children a needless tear." -A.W. Pink

Waking up the cub

I hope that in waking this cub from it's long winter nap, I will experience some good self care by expressing my thoughts through Candles On My Table. I love to write, but need the time to think creatively and put it into words. Usually I don't take the time. I should. I enjoy it. I enjoy reading other blogs. I love communication. Period. I love communication.

Since I am embracing 6-8 weeks of time at home I hope to have time to write. I don't know if I will keep it up after my recovery is over, but for now I will enjoy the medicine it provides. Since August of 2009 when I last blogged, a few beautiful candles have been added to our table. I am pretty certain I will be introducing each of them and their beautiful and unique light in our family.

As I sit on the couch in my pajamas this morning, wrapped in a blanket and watching the day unfold, I am excited to see what God puts on my heart to share. For me, the healing is beginning even before the surgery.